Modern lifestyles don't often allow the time and respite for the type of healing we require and the intensity of modern life speeds up the reactions of the mind/ body and spirit. Past conditioning and coping methods will determine how you resolve your thoughts and feelings, which in turn determine how you deal with your circumstances. When the tools in your box are no longer of use, you need to invest in new tools...
The flooding of the river basins on the East Coast of Australia are a great reminder how nature is a great equalizer. Emotion is like water, it needs to flow. However, like nature there are times in life when the rain continues to delude and emotion threatens to overwhelm our perception of change and circumstance.
This time last year, my river banks burst. Unfortunately, my husband passed away suddenly at age43 in March 2009. I had coped to the best of my ability and did everything in my power to stay buoyant and not be carried away by the waves of grief and sadness in the months that followed. However, in January 2010, life seemed empty, hollow and barren. Physically I was drained, emotionally I was conscious that I needed to feel my feelings in order to move forward and every fibre of my being told me that staying the same was too painful...
I knew that life was about "living fully" and "loving fully" which we had done with a passion. Even through his darkest hours, we chose to rise to the challenges of coping with extreme physical, mental and emotional pain and do what was needed to be done in order to create the best family life I could for our children.
Although when it came to "letting go fully" I was full of fear. The 'how' was unknown and invisible...I didn't know how I would survive. All I knew was why I needed to change and that was if I didn't stop to feel the emotion, it, like the swollen river banks would eventually overflow and overwhelm me.
So when my riverbanks burst last year and I really just wanted to jump off a cliff with my babes after Christmas and put an end to the dark mass of fear that was paralysing every second of every second hour, I decided I needed to focus on strategies that allowed time for my innerworld and reshape my outerworld to suit my needs. This took courage as the immediate response is to make decisions on the run...However I knew I needed to stop running. Being so, so busy meant that the sandbanks were no longer holding back the waters and I needed to reach for higher ground. I had always utilized meditation but it was in this time that it became particularly useful. To stop thinking and take a breath, really helped me move through that really dark space. I went into priority management mode...and realized through Craig's experience that running on adrenalin was no longer an option.
In my heart of hearts I knew we always have choices.
My intuition was screaming to me that I needed to slow down, rest in the void and that danger lurked in unexpected places if I returned to being busy out of fear. Babysteps were all that were required, I could not shift the mass of grief that had amounted over the last 3 years in one hit. The experiences that I had coped with were life changing, so why not give myself permission to really change my life?
So much of my life was out of control. Yet I was being beckoned to live my life with reckless abandonment, to the absolute fullest and with passion. Passion which was buried under grief.
I knew the first step was to trust myself. I had to trust that I had all the resources to create what I wanted in the short and long term.I had to step back and feel the deepest darkest recesses of my heart and if I was thinking about it, I was not truly allowing myself to feel. Stepping into this void was tough.
Meditation allowed me to reach that higher ground and gain perspective. I knew that I couldn't solve my problems by the same thinking that had created them. Meditation allowed me to relax and even if it was for the briefest moment, I connected with what I really wanted and believed that all things were possible. I trusted that my focus would create my reality and that I knew what was best for my girls and I. People could give me all the advice in the world but only I knew what truly resonated with my life's purpose. The way of life I had previously had not been working and I needed to change the underlying structures. I knew I had to focus on my truth. I had to accept where I was at before I had could see where I wanted to be. As dark and scary a place as that was at that time, it was merely my starting point.
It was at this point in time I used my will to:
-live in the moment.
-choose my focus carefully.
-stop focussing on the obstacles.
-trust my natural ability to connect to everything I wanted and needed.
-allow myself to listen to my intuition and go with the grieving nature of my heart, as this too would pass.
I would constantly give thanks ( and still do) for all that I had in this moment of time. This shifted my state from what was missing in my lfe, to the abundance that I did have all around me. I knew that the riches in my life weren't measured in possessions but in my relationships and these gave me faith that life was worth living.
One year on and I am also actively sharing these skills with others. The unknown now is welcomed and I have accepted the illusion of control, is just that ..." an illusion." The fear of what I didn't know, the fear of being in the void and the discomfort zone have been replaced with the certainty, that I would have been in greater pain, not giving myself this time and space and not trusting the wisdom that is in my heart. When you shift your state of mind outside your thoughts and feelings, you are guided by your natural ability and you trust it. You do know what's best for you, if you give yourself the time to stop. Everyone knows what they want, often they just don't believe they can have it.
You can create a life that feels good. You can lighten up.
When floodbanks burst, it is just a major sign from your heart that something big (some underlying structure in your life) needs to change. Remember whatever gets stuck in one emotional cycle, will only revisit you again, begging to be resolved at a later stage.
Life is a duality of positives and negatives, ups and downs. However each negative emotion can be the impetus for positive change. Surface changes to our outer world are relatively easy -as they can be bought. However changing feelings and thoughts that are constantly compensating for the notion that you are separate to what you want and creating balance in your innnerworld, is not as difficult as you might think. The rewards are also far more long term and enable you to manage change more effectively when things occur outside of your control.
Meditation is a practice that has been around for centuries. It is a tool that research demonstrates there are many benefits. There are now 84 000 documented ways to meditate. Pure Consciousness Mediation Nights are non-denominational and defy stereotyped connations of meditation. They are designed to create balance and allow you to relax so that you can connect to your intuition and follow the guidance of your own heart.
Pure Consciousness also now has an additional NEW service for people who are unable to make the time for Meditation classes or courses.
The EQUILIBRATION PROCESS - utilizes the interior sources of your painful emotions such as anger, jealousy and resentment and releases the negative charge from the thought process, to elevate your perspective. This process causes an immediate shift in your perceptions. The results are gained in only one session.
Why wait for something to burst? Why wait for the floodbanks to overflow? Why not try something new...Perhaps meditation could be the new tool you are looking for...
Intro Nights will be held @ The Canning River Eco Centre
- Wednesday 21st September @ 7.30-9.30pm...Cost $20
Don't you deserve to truly relax your thinking mind and allow your creativity and intution to prosper?
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